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Matt Jude

Matt Jude

@mattjude
Matt Jude

Matt Jude

@mattjude

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stop screaming stop screaming..

wandering stars for whom it is reserved the colours of light forever.

we dance for laughter, we dance for tears, we dance for madness, we dance for fears, we dance for hopes, we dance for screams, we are the dancers, we create the dreams.

i knew who i was this morning, but ive changed a few times since then.

lost in the memories of a deluded mind. dancing in the shadow of the sun's flames.

i like stuff ║█║▌♫ and colours

come find me ~~*

you, always you, never you, ever you. halving and splitting and mourning like you are a dance machine, and i writhe with you because....because i never can forgive your arms without me, nor forget your eyes without, eyes that said hello, and goodbye, and we wrote long and tedious love poems with our eyes, and we drew calligraphies, woodblock paintings of chinese chrysanthemums with our languid and sweet no sweeter than saccharine silences. and you, you help me up to the light in your arms like a tree carrying a dead baby, and i sat on top of your head feeling for once, tall and vibrant. it wouldn’t be the last time nor the first, and then i remembered there was always a first time, and i grew tired of stringing together clichés faster than my hand could bead them but then i remembered i am just a pastiche... and then... when words ceased functioning and i was writing you an algorithm that would determine the starmap of your destination, choreographing your fancy feet footwork, calculating your trajectory away? towards? me? uncertainty, brooding forevermore in the enmeshed, in the unknown as you once said and i was silently brokenly hunting for a piece of a clue that sometimes existed for there was so much mystery to your words.

my metaphysical world (the four elements):
| colours | the element of love -------------------
| chemicals | the element of wisdom -------------------
| flowers | the element of gestures -------------------
| metal | the element of construct -------------------

alchemy ♥ once you master the elements you master yourself.

so im a chilled personality, love being around people, hate stereotypes, generalisations, and labels.. i live dynamically, changing, re-creating myself every day. oh and i hate capital letters.

i tend to search for pure perfection in this turning world of chaos. ill never find it. but ill keep trying.

i bite my nails. i can't help this. i have multiple phone numbers. i dont trust doctors. i like red. i want life in multiples of three. im damaged - insane - and how would i know. i didn't say all the things that i wanted to say and you cant take back what you've taken away because i feel you, i feel you near me...
i can't go back (x3)
i must go on (x7)
<bridge>
<chorus>

for millions of years flowers have been producing thorns. for millions of years sheep have been eating them all the same. and it's not serious, trying to understand why flowers go to such trouble to produce thorns that are good for nothing? it's not important, the war between the sheep and the flowers? suppose i happen to know a unique flower, one that exists nowhere in the world except on my planet, one that a little sheep can wipe out in a single bite one morning, just like that, without even realizing what he's doing - that isn't important? if someone loves a flower of which just one example exists among all the millions and millions of stars, that's enough to make him happy when he looks at the stars. he tells himself 'my flower's up there somewhere...' but if the sheep eats the flower, then for him it's as if, suddenly, all the stars went out. and that isn't important?

and i love to contradict myself.

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holding the thread close to a dream
while intelligence becomes the steal
for what if gold showed, token sold
while manners abright and rightfully bold
make a wish a princess dream
unfold the map, a small lil bean
to vanish the air and trace out the new
so scared to love so guess who knew
beautiful voice creeps in my head
only one person can wear this red
traces behavior young and small
i see land, i must fall

-britney spears

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when i look back on my life, it's not that i don't want to see things exactly as they happened, it's just that i prefer to remember them in an artistic way. and truthfully, the lie of it all is much more honest because i invented it.

clinical psychology tells us, arguably, that trauma is the ultimate killer. memories are not recycled like atoms and particles in quantum psychics, they can be lost forever. it's sort of like my past is an unfinished painting, and as the artist of that painting, i must fill in all the ugly holes and make it beautiful again.

it's not that i've been dishonest, it's just that i loathe reality.

-gaga

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you are the bread and the knife, the crystal goblet and the wine.

you are the dew on the morning grass and the burning wheel of the sun. you are the white apron of the baker and the marsh birds suddenly in flight.

however, you are not the wind in the orchard, the plums on the counter, or the house of cards. and you are certainly not the pine-scented air. there is just no way you are the pine-scented air. it is possible that you are the fish under the bridge, maybe even the pigeon on the general's head, but you are not even close to being the field of cornflowers at dusk. and a quick look in the mirror will show that you are neither the boots in the corner nor the boat asleep in its boathouse.

it might interest you to know, speaking of the plentiful imagery of the world, that i am the sound of rain on the roof. i also happen to be the shooting star, the evening paper blowing down an alley, and the basket of chestnuts on the kitchen table. i am also the moon in the trees and the blind woman's tea cup.

but don't worry, i am not the bread and the knife. you are still the bread and the knife. you will always be the bread and the knife, not to mention the crystal goblet and - somehow - the wine.

-litany, billy collins

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<3 music:

i heart hardpop, alternative electropop, dance, psytrance, deep house, indie folk, punk rock and minimal.

some legends include britney spears, lady gaga, jeffree star, in this moment, pink, marilyn manson, la roux, flash republic, ke$ha, damien rice, missy elliott, katy perry, ville valo, bright eyes, helicopter girl, imogen heap, milky chance, kelly clarkson, paris hilton, tokio hotel, phantogram, the veronicas, flyleaf, röyksopp, ashlee tisdale, owl city, gossip, paramore, aly and aj, taylor swift, demi lovato, dave matthews band, jesse mccartney, jem, 3oh!3, hilary duff, kylie minogue, no doubt, madonna, gnarls barkely, snow patrol, nelly furtado, miley cyrus, jimmy eat world, the cranberries, darren hayes, vanessa carlton, rihanna, faithless, will smith, gwen stefani, we the kings, staci orrico, michelle branch, katie melua, donna lewis, panic! at the disco, destiny's child, lindsay lohan, alanis morisette, kelis, ciara, tamia, sugarbabes, outkast, simple plan, evanescence, ashlee simpson, natasha bedingfield, brandy, basement jaxx, and a lot more others.

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